The general public applauds this lady
There is an interesting paradox often attributed to George Washington, the first president of United States of America; and it says:
“To be prepared for war is one of the most effectual means of preserving peace.”
There is some truth in this saying as we watch the uneasy relationships that exist among modern world military superpowers with nuclear weapons.
United States and Russia are long-standing rivals. The U.S is aware Russia possesses nuclear weapons capable of destroying it, Russia knows same about U.S.
Because of this awareness, military superpowers know there could be miscalculation or a blunder, leading to a war of mutual destruction and so they came up with a plan. They decided to keep military communication channel so that they would be able to clear each other’s doubt over certain military moves.
It is this mutual understanding that makes it possible for United States to attack an ally of Russia; e.g. Iran and Russia would not intervene directly. Russia has been at war with Ukrainians for years but U.S decided not to offer Ukraine, an ally maximum military support against Russia because of the same reason.
Coming to terms with reality
How does the above analysis relate to cheating in marriage or relationship?
Well, I want you to understand that your partner is capable of cheating; and so are you.
After coming to terms with this harsh reality, just like two enemy countries, for fear of mutual destruction, decide to create a communication channel to avoid what they all fear- atomic bombs, both of you can begin to explore ways to minimize or block conditions that make cheating easier and compelling.
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Conditions that make cheating easy
Let me share with you some reasons or conditions that make it easy to cheat today and for that matter, you should not be surprised at all if it happens.
Lack of Community Living. Before this Gen Z, loud and confusing period we are currently in, spouses often live in large compound houses where everyone acts like experienced police officer over one another. As a lady, you dare not take any silly move, they would report you to your husband or boyfriend.
Today, largely, it is not like that. People live more private life in secluded apartments (self-contained house) and you may not be able to set eyes on your co-tenant for days or even weeks because everyone does everything within. There is no long queue to the bathroom or toilet which affords proper inspection of one another.
Some wives are locked up within the four walls of maximum-security prison of family house; especially if the man travelled. Every step of the lady is watched closely and so she may not dare easily. Today, that’s not common.
Spouses are able to live in private home/house and if one partner is unavailable, the other one stays alone or with the children. This affords him or her easier opportunity to do as it pleases.
Moral standard is no longer an issue. Our pastors no longer care about moral standard in our churches and communities. They are more worried about big tithes and huge sums of donation to put up magnificent church edifice.
Due to this, some of the most morally bankrupt individuals can be found in our churches and not night clubs. They are comfortable, active and very happy once they can donate money and dress flashy to church.
Career pursuits and physical separation. In our time, it is very common that a married lady can live and work in Kumasi while the husband lives in Central Region.
Flirtation in the office. There are some fine-looking men or ladies who have turned their offices or work places into a brothel and they persistently flirt with colleagues.
Just imagine the kind of pressure a married lady or man staying far from the partner would have to fend off in such lewd and lascivious environment.
Tough financial situations in our time place some of our ladies in a tight corner to choose between ‘getting back on the ground’ to gain or stand right in pain and need.
Pornographic material ‘full everywhere’. Back in the days, pornographic materials were scarce. One would have to suffer a great deal to have access to such things on cassette and where to watch is another tough barrier to cross. Today, explicit sexual contents “full everywhere”.
Sex is very cheap. Ladies dress up everything on their bodies except the breasts and backsides. Both older and young men put on light boxer shorts, set up camera on themselves to have ladies screaming about how large they are “down there”.
In the name of content clicks and content money, many partners including married ones have turned themselves into ‘softcopy’ porn-stars, recording and uploading on social media explicit sexual acts in bed-rooms.
All of these conditions and many others, make it very difficult to maintain sexual discipline in our generation. This is why I will repeat: Do not be too surprised if you or your partner gets caught up in the cheating web.
How to transform this ugly reality of cheating propensity into a powerful tool of protection of yourself or partner against what you all fear-cheating or infidelity.
The first step to prevent your partner from sleeping with another person is to accept the fact that she or he is very vulnerable and can easily do it; as already indicated. Trusting and boasting about your partner that “she or he can never do such a thing” is the easiest route to leading him or her into such things. To be continued……………………
If you are interested in learning more in this article, kindly reach out to my team and get a copy of my book titled “LOVE IS NOT UNCONDITIONAL”. Thank you.
