Note: This write up contains elements of lessons learnt at the Writing Clinic
Flatulence in the headline; did it upset you? Are you going to skip this piece because of such inappropriate word? Please hang on a bit, I will tell you through my experience why that F word is one of the most important things which can get doctors scared to death if it’s absent. But before then, permit me to digress small.
How many of us recognize that the best of our good or bad thought is formed while traveling; either by car or plane especially at night? Well, let me stick to car’s experience. I will leave the air travel to others to judge. I have passport but the truth is that I don’t even know yet where airport is located in Ghana.
However, on 29th of August this year, I had the opportunity to visit the airport. Unfortunately for me, that was the exact date for the writing clinic workshop. A day before, I had a call from the States to pick up a brother (first time visitor) of my good white sister I knew in Cape Coast at the Accra Int. Airport. I understood that receiving him myself in the morning could jeopardize my strong desire to attend the clinic and so I pleaded with my big sister to pick him up which she did. This is to tell you the high shelf of priority on which I placed the opportunity offered me by Manasseh and his friends. That’s just by the way.
At night, you don’t even have the benefit of enjoying the sight of trees and birds cruising on the wings of the wind. I would not mention other 4-legged wild lives. The other day, I was told how a driver suddenly packed his car in the middle of his journey to pursue an antelope that crossed the road into a nearby small forest. So, in Ghana, you and I know that no animal is wild enough to jeopardize relocation from its golden habitat of thick forest into a boiling pot of soup in the kitchen.
On my return to Cape Coast after leaving the house 2am for last year maiden writing clinic, I travelled by night and I couldn’t even observe motion parallax of vegetations. I was extremely tired but decided to engage in diversional therapy by putting down idea on my experience at the clinic.
I thought I was going to put down few lines and then retreat back to my weary mental sky, wondering when the car would finally approach Cape Coast township.
Rather, like a spirit that possesses, my thought process was activated in a manner I never imagined at that material moment of terrible fatigability. I have written four books and I understand how to make use of this strange, unexpected but effective possession of literary spirit.
I kept typing on my phone as ideas pour in. At a point, I got worried that the car would reach Cape Coast before I put down the last word. Well, I was able to complete about 10-page article before I stepped out of the car. Early in the morning just the next day, I was among the first few participants to share on the clinic page a comprehensive article of our experiences. The reactions and responses were encouraging and I really felt good. (Last year's article-click here to see more).
I thought I could do it again this year; but comfort, not extreme tiredness, didn’t let me.
This year, I did not wake up at 1 am in Cape Coast to travel to Accra in order not to miss the first session. I have relocated to Accra about 3 weeks earlier and I was happy I didn't have to go through the herk of dark hours and stressful journey to arrive on time.
From the MTN office to my sister’s place was just about 30 minutes’ drive. In the trotro car, I hurriedly pulled out my phone to type. But I realized I couldn’t even put down a suitable headline. This time, it was as if the spirit of writing whispered to me; “Bern, I do not possess easily in comfort; I’m sorry.”
Lesson
Complacency can kill any creativity; including creative writing. Do not wish for hardship; more importantly, do not look for comfort for the end of life is not to be comfortable but to do the will of the Creator come what may. Bernice Offei (1962-2026, Sept 12) Music: Life is so short. May her soul rest in peace.
Now back to the Main Headline: passing Air at the Clinic
The first time I learned how extremely important it is for another person to 'mess’ was when I was a student nurse at a surgical ward.
The doctors, pharmacists, all dressed up neatly in their signature white coat, nurses in their beautiful attire; I mean the medical team gathered on the ward for rounds in assessing patients. All of a sudden, I heard a loud piercing, familiar but forbidden sound. Without knowing the direction and source, one could easily tell that, this is certainly from nowhere else than the unholy trumpet of the backside of a patient.
As a novice, I never expected such kind of ‘unruly behavior’ from a patient who was normal and well oriented. At hearing it, I turned and looked at the medical team in anticipation of at least two reactions: their laughter or show of clear disgust. But to my disbelief, the team was very excited about such flatulence sound with surprising seriousness. Not only were they satisfied, they were happy about the intensity and its foul scent. I was truly confused at that point.
When they got to the next patient, the head of the team ask in the local dialect " Maame, woeyi mframa anor pei?”-Pardon my bad Twi phonics. It Means; “Have you pass air this morning?” And when the patient said no, I saw disappointment registered on their faces. There, for me, the urge to either laugh or get angry for having patients flatulating anyhow in front of others disappeared. Then my curiosity set it. Why are these doctors interested in whether patients pass gas or not?
I asked after the rounds and I was told that after surgery, one of the key pieces of evidence of good or bad prognosis is the ability of the patient to pass flatulence. The reason is that, anesthesia and surgical procedure or even health condition do halt the natural peristaltic movement of the gastro intestinal tract (GIT).
In the course of working, I do hear visitors and relatives complain: “How can you be on sick-bed and be blowing air like that.” Well, they do not know that it’s the best, relieving sound every surgical team would want to hear after major surgical procedure; - especially involving the gut directly.
Flatulence is part of the bye-product of digestion. Before surgery and just after surgery, patient fasts. there's no active food substance within the gut and so no one expects faces except gas in the form of flatulence which is a convincing sign of return of peristalsis as indicated earlier.
What’s the Point here?
Now, you may rightly ask; “What has flatulence on the hospital ward got to do with writing clinic?” Well, patient’s themselves may not understand the huge implication of releasing gas after surgery. Some of them could try to suppress and even lie about it for fear of embarrassment. You and I who had the chance to attend this writing clinic are those patients.
The medical team include Manasseh and his friends (Mr. Moomen, Ms. Maukeni Reibeiro, and support staff). MTN Ghana and Star Oil provide the health facility through sponsorship.
I wonder why they; including sponsors would organize such costly workshop, decide to make it free and open to everyone interested to apply. After several years on the job, I did thank God at the sound of flatulence coming from my patients who returned from theatre.
As a patient; in context, anytime I publish an article and someone commends me, I thank God for the life of Manasseh and his team for helping improve my creative writing skills.
Familiarity Leads to Contentment; they Say
These are very influential people. They have unrestricted access at corridors of power. People are ready to spend a lot in order to get access to them. Most of us, we could only view and admire them through our screens. But they gave us access, free of charge.
Mr. Moomen was not only the face that was once embossed on TV screens in every home across the country and beyond. without fear of exaggerative accusation, I can tell you that he’s one of the most intelligent and emotionally humane persons I have seen. Ms. Maukeni Rebeiro is one of the most beautiful ladies who carried herself with such class and respectability.
I do not lightly call anyone a mentor. In fact, most of those I call as such and even dedicate my books to are dead and gone years ago but their lives still influence my personal view of the world.
Manasseh is one person I can proudly call a mentor.
He's not a friend to many politicians and power brokers. He's not ready to dine on bloody table with those who possess power without compassion, might without morality, and strength without sight-to paraphrase my mentor Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jnr.
As someone who rose through the ashes of village to the high corridors of society’s most powerful, it is understandable if he decided to remain high up there beyond the reach of some of us. He did not do that. The evidence is clear to those of us who had the opportunity to encounter him.
Manasseh looks fragile, breakable on the outside like a butterfly but he's simply a powerful lioness who will fight anything to protect her little cups in the jungle.
If in doubt, go and ask those powerful individuals whose balls he held down strongly as they shamelessly eat the national meat deep down to the bones and do as they please.
Let me end it here by adding this: he's a Harvard graduate. Mr. Moomen is a Vice Registrar of one of Ghana’s reputable public universities. Ms. Maukeni is being chased by multinational corporations to couch, mentor and deliver speeches.
These are the calibre of persons we are fortunate to sit before for free as if it's usual. No, it's not. It's a rare opportunity.
Let's not take this opportunity offered us for granted
As a medical team, they expect us to pass air after painstaking surgery. The surgery of organizing such expensive and energy-draining creative writing workshop. It ought to throw us the challenge of producing air of creative writings or other literary arts.
Let us challenge ourselves to make them and the sponsors proud for giving back to society.
I don't believe Manasseh and his team, MTN Ghana and Star Oil are interested in organizing such programs to have you and I sit in front of them year after year just for fun.
Our actions and inactions must not let them question their investment for similar future programs.
Rather, we must let our productive, acquired, creative-writing skills push them to expand the program with more opportunities for future participants.
The writer is RN, author, public speaker and the founder of Bernajis Preventive Health Education (BPHE) as well as Patient Rights and Responsibilities-Ghana (PR&R).
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